How To Be a Good Student: A Complete Walkthrough

Pursing an education takes a lot a work. It can be even more difficult if you feel uncertain about what it takes to be good student. As a recent college graduate and first semester graduate student I can walk you through the intricacies of learning to become an excellent scholar.

The First Assignment – Getting Started

Hooray! You received your first homework of the semester! I glanced over the rubric, the assignment looks straightforward. The due date is a week from now. I have a crazy idea: let’s get it done early!

Sounds awesome!

Great! Now just get out your laptop and we can get started.

*Pulls laptop out of bag. Shakes the cookie crumbs out of the grimy keyboard. Sets laptop down.*

Alrighty, so open up Microsoft Word and we can get this party started.

Okay…… I just need to check the internet for something first. It will only take a sec.

Alright keep it brief.

Yeah yeah, I will. *Opens Google Chrome* Another Star Wars movie? Cool. That reminds me, is Rogue One still on Netflix? Better check just in case I want to watch it again. *Opens Netflix* Looks like it is! Oh look at that! New season of Supernatural!

Netflix.png

What the hell do you think you’re doing?!

Come onnn just one episode. Last season ended on a cliffhanger! I just need to know what happens and then I’ll focus. Promise.

Just one episode you say? Promise?

Yeah just one and done. Promise.

Okay, one episode couldn’t hurt.

TWO DAYS THREE HOURS TWENTY-SEVEN MINUTES AND ONE FULL SEASON OF SUPERNATURAL LATER:

WOW! What a great season! I can’t believe Dean did that!

….. What happened to just one episode!? That was a whole season! 22 episodes!

Look that was my fault. I didn’t think there would be so many cliffhangers. You know I don’t do well with uncertainty.

Ugh. Whatever let’s just close out of Chrome and open Microsoft Word.

*yawn* Would you look at the time? Almost midnight. I can’t do my best work if I’m tired. I will definitely start tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes and goes. Another tomorrow comes and goes. A string of tomorrows come and go.

Night Before Deadline

laptopnight.jpg

Bloodshot eyes strain to stare at the blinding white glow of the computer screen as I type feverishly. Is easeability a word? I feel like it is. Shakespeare invented words, why can’t I? Oh jeez, I should done this sooner! Damn you Netflix!

This is what happens when you don’t listen to me! – Barry

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