Final exams are over, summer is near, and I am home for 3 months! These are all great things, so why am I not excited?
Honestly I’m not sure why I no longer feel excited for summer break or returning home after months of being away. My motivation for studying hard and getting through finals was that once it was over I would be returned home; free to do whatever I wanted. Now that I am actually back home my excitement wavered sustainably. Nothing here feels like home and in many ways college is my real home.
In Bloomsburg I felt accepted and important because of the decisions I made as a freshman. That first step was getting involved and helping people gave me a sense of community and responsibility that I never experienced at home in Stroudsburg. Determined to change who I was my college experience transformed into my self-improvement journey. And for the most part I did change. I gained confidence, social skills, and met a lot great people. I realized that if it wasn’t for those people I met my first year experience would have been entirely different. My friends on the seventh floor were especially detrimental in changing the way I think. They supported me when I was down, helped me when I was in trouble and made sure I never got too full of myself. They were a family to me and I thank them for being such great people.
My challenge now is returning home without relapsing to my old ways. I will continue to work hard and seek responsibility until I am fully satisfied with where I am.